in the words of caitlin reid: "in blogworld I've been kind of sucking at life, and there's quite a bit to catch up on." but, dispite all the wonderful, confusing, frustarating, annoying, joyful, crazy, amazing events of the past week/last few days...i've decided to just post a poem i wrote almost a year ago at one of my favorite gettaways and one of the most inspiring places i have ever been.


Insomnia

Pressure
Like a shaken warm soda builds up inside.
I can't manifest myself in the form that you wearn for me to bne.
I am not a chameleon,
Changing at your command.
The words don't filter down for me at 3 am
While the rain beats down
As they do for you,
On you
You made me feel as vulnerable
Naive
Loved


{The way you make me feel}


The bed is warm with your slumber
Sleep lurks above my insomnia
Like a carrot dangled in front of a horse
Always just
Out of

{Reach}

The ticking of the clock drives me insane
And you,
With your body weight heavy on the mattress
As its springs cry out beneath you --


Pressure
Screeching as a kettle ready for tea
I wish I could scream so the sandman knew I was ready
Ready for that peace
The relief that is my nostrils flaring with snores in the night.

The bed is comfy
- Hard,
Like you
My pillow sends icy chills up my
Spine
And down the covers
You say

That's the way a pillow SHOULD be.



My mind wanders away from my control
Off into a land that is
- You
Off into the hills and valleys of your

- Soft body
Pining for soemthing more than is already there
Attempting to
- Discover
As Columbus
Attempting to
- Boldly go where no woman has gone before
Venturing out into this new land
This
New man
This man that is mine
. . . Mine
. . . Mind
- My mind is adjusted back and I've been dreaming

Damn

You haunt me in the way that it makes me feel good
Real good

Good enough to eat you
And lick my lips
And then - lick yours

Member that tiume
When I kissed you
That, first time
When we were alone
And you quivered
And . . . I smiled
You shook
with happiness
As a little boy with his new
-Bat
And I am the catcher across the field
Ball in hand ready for some
- Play


I can't escape you
But, I don't wait to
All I want to do is sleep

And then I am awakened by
Morning
Sunshine waskes the grime of night off my gentle body,.
The sweet aroma of breakfast engulfs
My once flaring nostrils . . .


You appear



I smile


My nights are always restless with this

In
-Som-
Nia

But the sight of you
First thing in the morning
Makes me feel well rested
Alive - awake
You arms sweep down and surround me
Trapping me in a place I'm happy to be

Hold on tight
Sweet one
The nights are long
The days are short
But our love will outlast
My
In-Som-Nia






And thats all folks.



-ker-