::it's 3 am, i must be lonely::

it is three am, and yes, no one is here, but i had a good day. i mean, i didn't wake up until 12, didn't get out of bed until 4:30 [ yes pm! ] and then kin's presence and seeing her dressed made me want to get out of my pjs, so i changed and we ventured to the grocery store [what a wonderful word, "VENTURED"]. then, we made dinner! how lovely. then rachel and i had our very own "quality time" to tell stories, watch silly girlie movies, and just hang out and chat [i did fall asleep a lil during a vander-bar movie...]. so i had a good day.


i miss the stars. looking up at the night sky, the bitter night sky, it just is so sad to see it dim like that. i saw one star at 3 am. one. it must be so lonely up there all by itself. i know i would be. i wonder if stars get paranoid, as humans do, wondering if they will be the only one left, the only one who cares. we do all care, don't we? even if we don't always show it. we are aware of ourselves and are prospective to others emotions, even if we can't always express that [men are horrible with this concept; i mean, straight men, anyway]. well, not all straight men are horrible with this, and not all gay men are good at it. and i'm not concluding that women can always sense what another human is feeling, we just sometimes understand that you don't need to start at the thought, but the emotion, and you will be able to feel out the next steps.
i'm sorry if i suddenly became deep, but thats me. i like letting my mind ramble on a single thought and writing it down [true artists; word association] it's like how when you dance and you can close your eyes when listening to the music and just hear the steps and how they piece together so perfectly. and all you want to do is be able to shine like that and live up to each one of those steps expectations. you dancers know. maybe i sometimes feel like i'm stcuk in that tight close up box where you can only see my eyes, but its not the entire episode, so i know that eventually the camera pulls back to where we can all be comfortable again....please don't cry, please...

i'm happy. i'm content. i'm in love. and i am very thankful to all of my friends. even a do-nothing day like today was amazing because of some friendly faces and my true love's voice.


it's like the book you can't put down. the second act, the next quarter, you just can't wait to see what happens next :)



::pontiluf's leg healed, and he was able to walk again, so he went off to find a new adverture. i didn't miss him::

all these about a single star . . .


.::ker::.